I went bowling earlier tonight. (223, 178, and 202, in case you were wondering.) While I was at the bowling alley, I got a text message from one of my cousins. I had done some technical work on her behalf recently, but this text message was of a social nature. Long story short → sure, I'll stop by the local redneck pool hall and have a beer.
After a short time, she and her crew were ready to leave the pool hall. Predictably, of course, she asked if I wanted her to stop by my house and take a look at the aforementioned technical work. This was obviously the underlying basis for the original social invite. It was 1am, so having a few visitors seemed perfectly logical to me. Let's do it.
She reviewed my work, handed me some cash, and then hung around to talk for a little while. By the time she left, the re-airing of the new bible show on the History Channel was wrapping up. From what I saw of that show, it was pretty lousy. Just a halfassed attempt to brush across a few key biblical stories and then skip hundreds of years before brushing across the next key biblical story. I was unimpressed.
Then, at 2am, there was the viking show. That one was also new. As tends to be the case where television is involved, I again found myself unimpressed. I'm just not a TV guy, I guess. I may check out another episode at some point in time, since Ragnar Lodbrok is an interesting historical/mythological figure, but that first episode was shitty.
Then, as tends to be the case after a 2am show has concluded, it was 3am. What to do at 3am... what to do? I could go to bed, but that's not my cup of tea. I could read something, but it was 3am, so... I could flip through the channels and see if anything was worth watching.
I found live baseball on the MLB Network. I like baseball - a lot. In early March, I especially like baseball that counts for something, unlike the typical spring training game. The World Baseball Classic was the perfect fit. And did I mention that it was live - at 3am?
But here's the dilemma. The game was being played between China and Cuba. If you wonder how I feel about communists, then you clearly don't know me. Visit the navigation links at the right of the page and do some reading. If you already know how I feel about communists, then you're starting to get an idea of my problem. For whom should I cheer? There's no easy answer. The ChiComs are probably the world's biggest offenders right now, but the Cubans damned near caused WWIII back in the 60's. Personally, I take a somewhat forgiving view toward the Chinese, since I buy a lot of cheap shit that was made in China. But then again, the Cubans make good cigars. And I do enjoy a good cigar.
Based on the few people that I've met from the respective countries, I find the Chinese to be more likable. Then again, I recently took a class that taught me about my cultural predisposition to hate people with dark skin. It hardly seems fair to the Cubans that they should suffer as a result of my latent racism. I mean, clearly I'm racist toward everybody other than pasty white males, but the Cubans are darker. So I'm more racist toward them. Studies say so. Studies conducted by people with PhD's and shit. Who could argue with that?
So, do I root for Cuba in order to compensate for my hatred of dark people? Or do I root for China in order to compensate for my hatred of those who pursue "progress" by killing millions of innocent people? It's a tough call. And we haven't even gotten to the part where both teams wear uniforms that would look cheap on your local beer league softball team. As a white heterosexual male, clearly I hate the gays. So it's no surprise that I fail to appreciate fabulous uniforms like these.
So there you have it. Which team should I support? And why?
(Spoiler alert: I hope an asteroid hits the stadium and takes out both teams. You know, because I'm white... meaning I'm racist.) But let me know. Anything else I should support?
