Exciting News

I generally set aside a decent sum of my money for the future and then blow the rest.  First come the bills that I have to pay.  Then, whatever is left gets spent on whichever frivolous pursuits tickle my fancy.  In an effort to strengthen my balance sheet though, it has occurred to me that I might do well to either increase my revenues or cut my spending.  Given that I can't legally confiscate someone else's cash (unlike some folks), my best bet would be to cut my spending.

So what did I decide?  Less beer?  Less food?  Less travel?  Less entertainment?  Hell to the naw!  Here's my brilliant solution - I won't buy a Mercedes next year.  BOOM!  I just cut $50,000 in spending!  That's pretty exciting, eh?

If this idea sounds ridiculous, it should.  That's exactly how our federal government plans to tackle the debt situation facing the nation.  Let's go ahead and accept that our president is not a pathological liar and he really does have a plan to "save" $4 trillion over the nex ten years.  Does that mean our debt goes from $14.5 trillion down to $10.5 trillion?  Hah!  Of course not.  It means that our $14.5 trillion becomes something upwards of $20 trillion. (You know, instead of $24 trillion.)  AKA - They're not cutting shit.

Reid's plan doesn't cut shit.  Boehner's plan doesn't cut shit.  Hell, even Ryan-the-granny-killer's budget doesn't cut shit.  They all play games with projected future numbers to make it seem like things are getting back on track, racking up more and more debt all along the way.  Therefore, I propose that we all agree not to buy a new Mercedes next year.  We can donate our collective "savings" to the Treasury and pay off the Chinese in no time.  Yeah, I know.  Stupid.

In related news, self-described conservatives who are clamoring for a deal involving a balanced budget amendment are actually a bunch of cowards.  The idea of a balanced budget makes them feel all warm and fuzzy, right?  So then screw the amendment and get straight to it.  The budget will be balanced by the middle of August if we do nothing.  Money in =  money out.  Done.  If they really want to stop the borrowing, then they can stop the borrowing.  Sure the government would have to slash and burn quite a few departments, but what do you think would happen if you had a balanced budget amendment?  Massive, crushing tax hikes or massive, painful slashes in spending.  It's coming one way or the other.  If you want a balanced budget, then just give Obama the finger and get on with it.

I know what comes next...

"But they'll downgrade our debt and interest rates will rise!"  Irrelevant.  If we're done borrowing, then we only have to pay the rates to which the buyers agreed in their respective auctions.  There is no such thing as a retroactive interest rate hike on a Treasury bond.  You buy the bond and you get a fixed rate until it matures, then you get your principal back.  The reason that we're currently subject to rate hikes is that we're constantly borrowing new money to pay interest on old money.  No more borrowing would mean that those interest payments have to come from tax receipts.  AKA - interest rates and bond ratings wouldn't matter.

To be clear - I'm not advocating a default.  I wouldn't mind one, but I'm not advocating it.  You see, I wouldn't give a rat's ass if the federal government cut 100% of its non-military spending tomorrow.  My fellow Americans would positively freak out though, once they realized that the feds have their tentacles into just about everything.  The ~40% in cuts that would balance the books would lead to a nationwide panic attack, with a pretty steep economic recession thrown in just for good measure.  I can't stand most people as it is.  I can only imagine how shitty this country would be if you were all caught up in a financial panic.

My point is simply to point out the absurdity of the whole argument.  We're not bickering over whether we'll go bankrupt.  We will under either party's approach.  We're not even bickering over how quickly we'll go bankrupt.  The pace will be roughly the same under either party's approach.  (Slightly slower under the Republican plan, but not much.)  We're bickering over ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.  The dumbassed speeches about corporate jets don't fix anything.  The imaginary reforms to entitlements don't fix anything.  The die has been cast.  Unless you see a budget where federal outlays are smaller year-over-year, you're being sold on the idea that you can cut spending by not buying a Mercedes.  I hope you're not that gullible.